Life Coaching for Parents

with Torie Henderson

You are getting warmer….

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I just finished up my “Getting What You Want” summer camp with some lovely and boisterous teenage girls. So much fun. One of the games we played was the old, “You are getting warmer….” Do you remember that game? You try to find a hidden object while getting clues about whether you are “warmer or colder”? I used it to demonstrate how your life tells you if you are on the right path to who you are meant to be, or getting further away from your destiny. They loved this game but of course when we are navigating our way through life, our clues are not as obvious as a bunch of screaming girls so they were only allowed to give silent hints. (Although you’d be amazed how loud silent teenage girls can be!)

I used to hear words like “gut instinct” and “intuition” growing up but no one ever explained what they were exactly. My goal with these girls, is for them to know how to listen to this “voice” of their higher self. I taught them many methods for tuning in, but this game was one of their favorites. We play this game our whole lives with choosing different groups of friends (some are warmer….some slightly colder) different subjects in school, what kind of music we like, romantic relationships, careers, jobs, political views, when to have kids and where to live. Sometimes you don’t know which direction to step or where your journey is taking you and it gets confusing and frustrating.

One of the girls decided to take a break from her sport because she was feeling too much pressure and stress (cold) and yet without it, she didn’t feel any warmer. Good to know! Sometimes, you have to take action, commit to something, until you get feedback (still cold). Betsy was a stay home mom but didn’t like it (cold). She went back to her old full time job and didn’t like that either (still cold). Just like in the game “You are getting warmer” this is the time to slow down, take stock, think about where was the last place you felt warm, and try again.

You will go through your whole life this way. You don’t have just one destiny or one linear path. Life will take you into many interesting places and the more experiences you have, the more you will know which direction feels warmer and which feels colder. Don’t get caught up on making the right or the best decisions. The most important thing these teenagers are here to remind us, is that life is a game and it’s supposed to be fun.

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