Summer is here and it’s time to give your kids room to explore their individual passions and follow their bliss. But what if all they want to do is play video games? Or it’s day two of vacation and they are already bored and missing their friends?
If your kids passions are inconvenient or unclear, try tuning into your own. Children learn by imitation so one of the best ways to teach your kids to be happy, successful and passionate is to focus on your own life.
No one can tell you what your calling is or who you are meant to be, but you can learn to listen to the whispers the Universe is sending you! Knowing we are here for a reason helps us feel connected to something bigger than ourselves, helps us feel excited and purposeful about our lives, and therefore, is one of the greatest gifts we can give our children.
Before we can teach our kids how to listen, we have to trust it for ourselves. So often we think, “Competitive sports changed my life for the better and taught me so much, so my kids should be in competitive sports.” Or “My success came easily because I learned how to study, get straight A’s, and had lots of friends so I can’t imagine how my child will be successful with her negative attitude towards school.” When we assume our child’s path is the same as ours, it blocks us from seeing them clearly. We end up arguing with them, their teachers, peers, coaches, wishing their personalities were different, instead of remembering we are all perfect as we are.
Learn to listen to the whispers in your own life by doing these two exercises:
1- Start a list of “What I Want/What I don’t Want” and add to it every day. Go on FACEBOOK and notice any posts where you get jealous or annoyed. “I just passed the bar exam!” “Ran 10 miles today!” “Our view of Kailua Beach”. Jealousy isn’t bad, it’s just a sign that you are meant to have that, too. Anything you feel a physical or emotional response to, add it to your “What I want/What I don’t want” list. Whether it’s a vacation, a new job, or going back to school, your higher self knows what’s next for you and it’s always better to pay attention to the whispers instead of waiting for the Universe to knock you upside the head. For example: Shelly was annoyed by her friends tri-athalon posts and everytime they started talking about it, she rolled her eyes and walked away. Once she realized her gag-reflex was a sign from her higher self, she started playing tennis once a week, something she loved doing before her kids were born, and taking more bike rides with her kids. Now she is happy for her friends that they are doing what they love, because she is doing more of what she loves.
2- Look back into your childhood and make a list of your favorite movies, books, TV shows, school subjects, activities, trips, experiences, friends, games to play. Look for the common threads! For example: My favorite things to play were real life games (store, house, school, bank, etc.) and board games (The Game of Life). My favorite books were Ginnie’s Babysitting Business, The Popularity Plan, and, of course, the Judy Blume collection. The TV shows I liked were Growing Pains and Family Ties (no Star Trek or Crossfire for me!) and when I was 13 I wanted to be “Dear Abby” and write an advice column. If I had known life coaching was a profession, for sure I would have found it sooner. All the signs were there.
Just like me, your kids might invent their own career, or the work they are best suited for, hasn’t been invented yet. To best help them, focus on the big picture and what lights you up, then talk about it out loud. Recognize the signs the Universe is sending to help you listen to your higher self and theirs. Your kids may not listen to every word you say, but for sure they are watching every move you make!
Want to feel more connected with your purpose? Want to feel fully alive as you help your kids find passion and confidence? Join me for my three week telecourse: Cultivating Passion and Confidence. Sign up by Tuesday, June 17th and get a free life coaching session with me!