Last week, in episode #84, I answered a question from a mom, Elana, whose daughter had outgrown a friendship and wanted to move on. The problem Elana was dealing with was pressure from the other girl’s mom, who was desperate for help in maintaining their daughters’ friendship. Elana wanted to be nice and do the right thing, but also wanted to support her daughter being able to choose who she wanted to hang out with.
The day before this podcast was released I received an email from another mom, Tracy, who felt desperate to help her daughter with her friendships. The synchronicity was too perfect to pass up so I asked Tracy if she would let me coach her on the podcast so we can learn what it’s like to be on the other side of things.
I want to be clear that Tracy is not the same mom Elana referred to in episode 84. Just another mom in a similar situation. My hope is that by listening to both sides, all Supermoms will grow in compassion and understanding to help deal with these types of situations.
“My 11 year old daughter wants to break into a friend group and it’s tough. One of the girls she is good friends with and they have played together, but with the remaining 5 girls, we ask for playdates after school and to ‘do online school’ together and it seems like there is always an excuse. These girls are in her ‘class’ this year, but there is no relationship yet. I text their moms and ask for them to play, but it is one-sided. I am not in this social group. I feel desperate when I am texting them and kicking myself for maybe not making my daughter do soccer so that we would be in this group!”
“How do you explain to your child that we are sounding desperate?!?!!?!!?”
“In the meantime, I encourage her to branch out and play with and get to know other girls in her class. She is not interested in doing so. So heart-breaking. She is super outgoing and very social. Yes, she sees her older sisters having friends over and making their own playdates, so it makes it extra hard for her.”
“I would love your advice. I listen to you weekly and think you are the BEST!!!”